Addendum to Life is Purna-Full

I just realized that I completed my blog with "My life is good. It isn't perfect. It is Purna". Purna means full, complete, lacking nothing, perfect. So, really, it (me, self, reality) is perfect in that my life is complete in that it encompasses all aspects of being, the entire spectrum of colors. Most importantly, I am whole as I am Full of Chit!!!!

Life Is Purna-Full

It was so wonder-Full to be at last Sunday’s Rock Your Chit Practice with Laura and company. The theme was Purna, which was just perfect for me, as that is how I would describe my life right now. I’ve been Full of love, happiness, joy, and peace, for the last few months, I wonder if I might be arrested for excessive bliss! I’ve also been so full of thoughts, that it just seems like it is time to share again.

As I’d shared on an earlier blog, the last four years (actually more like ten, but the last four in particular) were very difficult for me. And, what made them so difficult, besides some of the circumstances, was that I was so isolated. It was a situation that I created for myself, and yet, the circumstances lent themselves to “suffering alone”. Unfortunately, it was a lonely and very sad place to be, until I finally found friends who were going through similar experiences. Misery really doesn’t love company, but misery needs friends and support. I am so grate-Full to these beauty-Full beings for holding my hand when I really needed something to hold on to.

Last fall, my life shifted. And, one of the catalysts was Laura. The first workshop I took with her, the theme was Shakti. It was about building Shakti within, but more importantly, how do we use the Shakti, what do we do with this incredible energy within? The answer: Share.

So, that’s what I’ve been doing. I am sharing and opening myself to the possibilities. My world, that had been so small (my own doing) has become so BIG, so infinite, so LIGHT. I am creating space instead of burying myself. I’ve now been through Part 1 and Part 2 of the Anusara Immersions with John. Everything about Shiva Shakti Tantra resonates through the core of my being. Yes, the light is so bright after being in the dark for so long. I have awakened and it feels so good.

I have been wondering how long this may last? Every morning I think, am I still happy? And the answer is a resounding “YES”. It is simply amazing, considering I felt I was living a nightmare for so long. Sometimes I have concerns that by being more open I am making myself vulnerable, as sharing may not be received in the same manner it is being offered. My intent is good. My life is good. It isn’t perfect. It is Purna.

Practicing the Austerities

I'm writing about the austerities, with loving gratitude to Laura. Primarily I'm trying to work them off the mat, at work, which is the most challenging place in my life. That's the place where I don't feel as much like AriANANDA, as I do like ArianANGER! :)

Anyway, if you're interested, check out my blog http://theforceexpansive.blogspot.com

Love and blessings,
AriANANDA!

Shiva Shakti Tantra: Sutra Takes Form (Finally!)

Last week was one of the most amazing weeks of my life. Immersing with John Friend and all of my Anusara friends was fulfilling beyond what I could have imagined. I felt so loved, so energized, so shaktified. Every moment was so joy-full, so shri-full, so FULL. Learning more about the roots of Anusara through Shiva (Divine Nature) Shakti (Divine Creative Energy of Transformation) Tantra (Weaving together all aspects of life) has deepened the meaning of this beautiful practice both on and off the mat. The timing of John's Immersion couldn't have been more perfect, just like the timing of meeting Laura and connecting with the LC Posse. I love this ride, I love this journey, I love this life!

I've been pondering what pose best represents my sutra: With Courage towards Expansion while Hugging the Midline. I've been vacillating and even procrastinating about making a decision. John had many messages last week and one of them was urgent....DO IT NOW!!! The time is now, you need to act now. Why are we waiting??? We don't know what the future holds, but we do know what we have now and what we want now.

So, here it is. My pose: Adho Mukha Vrksasana. In the middle of the room.

Phew. I said it. I wrote it. I am afraid, but I so want to do this. I have a strong handstand. I could stay at the wall for minutes at a time. I can go to the wall, and move away from the wall and balance (much of the time). Being in the middle of the room brings the "f" word (FEAR) into my being. But, I know I need to do this. Will I fall? Yes. Will I survive. YES! Will I be able to stand on my hands in the middle of the room? Yes and No. But, it isn't about the pose, but what I will receive from my efforts. Courage (Shiva/Auspiciousness), Expansion (Shakti/Dancing), Hugging the Midline (Tantra: Embracing Dark/Light, Feminine/Masculine, Happy/Sad, Yes/No, Hit it/Missed it!).

Thank you to John, to Laura, to the LC Posse and the Anusara Kula which continues to grow and support me on this path. It's So Wonderful!!!

Ariananda: Sutra takes form

As I've been thinking about my sutra and my intentions for 2010, it occurred to me that a single pose embodies my vision for the year. It's a pose that challenges me greatly, that's fundamental and yet a serious stretch, where I have a lot of progress to make, a lot of pulling in to do, and a lot of pushing out. It's a pose that commemorates a giant leap, a celebration of great feats performed for love and friendship.

It's Hanumanasana.

Ok, so I've never been able to do the splits in all my 47 years. Why start now?

Why not?

It's not even whether I can finally, finally settle comfortably on the floor. That would be great. I would certainly celebrate! It's more the working-toward that I am interested in, the coming-back-to repeatedly. Oh yes, the sadhana.

As we've been hearing in class for weeks now, sadhana realizes intentions. Practice doesn't just make perfect, practice itself *is* perfect. And so Hanumanasana will be my sadhana this year, a pose in which I'll really feel my sutra -- every breath, rejoice! every breath, love! And every moment in Hanuman will help me hold my vision clear -- how may I serve, how may I add more love to the world?

Now that I've pronounced it, I know you'll be with me this year to meet the challenges of Hanumanasana. And more than that, I know I'll do my own part to help you meet your challenges, to leap to great heights with a full heart.

And so I'm curious: what form does your sutra take? What pose sums it all up?

XX

Ariananda: Sharing an inspiring blog post

Some of us have had the great pleasure of meeting Scott Marmorstein, the healer. Today, on his birthday, this is what he shared on his blog. So inspiring! YES, let's be great!!

http://networkedblogs.com/p24486444

XOXO

Sutra-volution

Happy Sunday All!

Been working on my sutra, and I wanted to share with you how it's gone because it’s lovely how a combination of opening and connection to the divine and to our kula created a more authentic intention and a deeper understanding.

In mid-December, my first attempt at a sutra was born in reaction to some challenging work issues. It went something like this, 'purify my intentions, and relinquish my impact to the divine.' My desire was to set positive thought in action, while releasing liability for the ripples I initiated, and more importantly, letting go of how those ripples landed with others. Prone to an overactive sense of responsibility, I felt a need to contain my world to that which I could control. I remember, when I said it out loud, it landed flat, and felt like I was throwing up my hands completely, shedding all responsibility. While I’m still not sure what level of responsibility I can take for how others behave, I immediately noticed the feeling of separation that sutra generated. As I sat with this sutra (and its shadow), I recognized how difficult it would be to set in motion positive intentions when oriented this way. Needless to say, the only surviving aspect of this sutra is a seed of conscious intent. A cultivation of presence felt right as a way to feel the depth of gratitude and appreciation for all the wonderful things coming in to my life, as well as address challenges with fewer veils.

During the New Year’s class, my sutra evolved to a practice of presence in the mudya. To me, presence represents momentary awareness and deep listening, to myself, others and the larger community. At this point in sutra-volution, the mudya referred to my mid-line or the point of balance of any set of extremes, which, for this bendy girl, is one of the deepest revelations of Anusara. Mudya goes beyond the physical; off the mat, hugging to the mudya helps me balance between being and becoming, observance and action, light and shadow. This sutra felt right – and I was happy, but something nagged at me. Presence in the mudya seemed irrelevant to the insight I gained around my tendency to separate myself.

Enter Laura and you, beautiful kula! Last weekend, I realized during savasana the layer of meaning I’d been missing! Mudya is the middle, and also the interior. A presence in the middle suggests I’m on the inside, and part-of a whole, whether that be Larke, a home, a community, a relationship, a system or a universe. When I’m present to being in the middle of all those things, I can’t be separate from them; my participation is contributing to a larger whole – how I participate then becomes my choice. This epiphany hit deep, even its form reveals how seemingly disparate themes are unified into a whole. Presence in the mudya – what a lovely way to both set a goal, and gently remind me of my role in the universe.

This sutra has unraveled into such a gift with many dimensions of meaning, surely there are others out there - what does presence in the mudya mean to you?

Coming Home

Although I've been working on my sutra for quite a while, it wasn't until New Year’s Day morning, just before the advanced practice with Laura, that I had settled in on it. I had given it the working title, The Expansion Project, the project of course being ME. I knew it needed to be refined, and I knew I wanted to expand out of the place of fear I’d been residing in for the last few years.

The last decade was a rough one for me, especially the last five years. I lost both my parents and was fearful of losing my youngest daughter. I suffered two huge injuries: a neck injury three years ago which has left me with nerve damage and pain on my left side, and, a broken left wrist, which I have thankfully recovered from fully. Through all of these "losses" I lost sight of my Self. Although yoga has been a part of my life since I was a young girl, and I've been instructing for years, I thought it was time for me to pursue a different path.

This past summer while in Idaho, I spent quite a bit of time reading, practicing yoga and contemplation. I came to the realization that I was mis-interpreting the “messages”. Rather than pursuing a different path, I was to keep following this path, the Path of Yoga, of Spiritual Realization, this is my Sadhana, my Dharma. I needed to come Home.

Upon returning to California, I met Laura in St. Helena at a retreat. Although I had known of her, I had not met her. She was/is a revelation. I decided to go to her Careyes retreat, barely a month later. While there, my Sadhana became clearer and my heart filled and flowing with love.

Although the last decade was rough, that cycle ended and the new one has begun with hope, light and expanding love. Practicing on new year's day was amazing! Beside me was Laura, across from me Ariane (my birthday sistah!) and surrounded by new friends, who were helping me to hug the midline (mudya)!!! After class, my husband and I spent the afternoon with friends of my parents who I have known for 44 years! It was the perfect way to begin the New Year: New Friends, Old Friends. Expansion. I further refined my sutra:

With Courage to Expansion While Hugging the Mudya

With Love and Gratitude to Laura, the LC POSSE and all my friends.

New Beginnings

Here it is, the first day of the New Year! As Laura said, and as Ariane and Trixie reiterated, the way we end one cycle is the way we will begin the next. Those in Laura's class on Wednesday night experienced a strong, heartfelt ending in the form of a beautiful "om", with multiple voices blending in the same sweet harmony that filled the room and the hearts of the kula members. We are all so blessed to be surrounded and supported by one another - and to have the privilege and the joy of being in the presence of Laura's shining love, devotion, and superlative guidance! We have wonderful things to look forward to in the new cycle!

As we end the old year and begin the new, sutras are forming and being shared! So far, the words have not quite coalesced, but the thought behind my sutra is to have an open heart that is ready to let the shakti flow in fully and to let the love, light, and strength flow out abundantly. Another thought that occurs is a need to listen to one's body, to moderate as necessary, to "do no harm". In my excitement over finally being able to push up into a back bend away from the wall, it seems that the third enthusiastic backbend of the night on Wednesday was one too many, and I immediately developed a swollen, tender, bruised wrist as a result. "Ahimsa" is ringing very loudly in my ears; strong intention coupled with attentive "listening" will be the new approach!

Thank you, Ariane, for setting up this blog, and I look forward to receiving and sharing thoughts with you and others in the "LC Posse" in the year ahead. I wish you all a very special and blessed year 2010, especially those of you who have had some very rough times during this past year. Hugs and love to you!